Hi cutie! (yes, you are pretty, like, look at yourself in the mirror wow i’m flustered although i’m asexual)
I’m so excited to finally be writing these lines, since it means that the release of the demo of The Stories of the Boys I Loved is approaching! So, I guess I have some thoughts to share! But first, please take a look at this meme I made:

WRITING YOUNGER CHARACTERS

Firstly, writing this game was a very… different experience from my previous one. The Life I Lost was a bittersweet story about pregnancy and parenthood, with grown-up characters (Jasper being 26 and Megan 28). So, you would expect from them mature reactions, especially regarding the issues the game tackles.

Therefore, switching to writing teenage characters was at the same time weird and fun, as teenagers behave very differently from grown-ups as they are usually quirkier (especially in comparison with characters being in their late 20s; I guess the contrast would be less striking with Isaac from La Vie en Rose, since he's certainly around 19-20 years old and certainly quirkier than anyone in this cast who isn't Oliver). Yet, since the game takes place in Japan, I had to be careful with how expressive or outgoing the characters are: after all, the honne and tatemae culture is quite important there, and I hope I managed to find a balance between the characters toning down their real self in order to meet their social obligations and the joy linked to their age (that was actually the reason for Oliver’s introduction in the game, as Daisuke was initially meant to be the only love interest; I thought having an extra-quirky character would help make the others look more composed).

And this is maybe strange for me to try to portray teenage as such a joyful age, since these characters, behind the scenes, have quite serious character arcs. But I suppose that’s what makes this story about slowly giving up childhood to eventually become adults, dealing with their problems and trying to balance the good and bad consequences of their decisions before taking them. After all, everything in life is consequential and that’s what helps us grow as people, at every age of course, but especially at this one.

Also, it might come as a surprise since it’s the primary inspiration of many visual novels, but this one is actually my most anime visual novel (and perhaps even my first anime visual novel). So, I had fun tackling clichés: Daisuke is a really sweet take on the “cool mysterious guy” trope while Oliver, although he is a more usual “cute boi” character, his look on things is sometimes surprisingly mature. Renjiro is of course an epic take on the “popular, perfect and handsome boy” trope and Hana is a funny modern rewriting ot the yamato nadeshiko trope (although Hana being one is only suggested by her composed nature, her cooking and her mastering of calligraphy in the demo, the final game expands more on that).

HOW I MANAGED TO PUT GAYS IN AN OTOME GAME

This game also marks the second time I work on an otome game, after Eternal Winter, back in December 2020. It already feels so close yet so far away. Yet, it’s fun to work on such a classical genre of visual novels but, of course, me being me, I had to bring gays.

Now, I have to say this game is the combination of two ideas I had: Hana was created more than three years ago (and was at the time named Anna; I had a thing with my otome heroines having a name starting with “An”). It was a story about dating boys, helping them realise their projects and supporting them: in this version, Renjiro was actually a love interest, and you would help him open his own bakery, while helping him with some more serious issues, which I won’t reveal since, although they have been toned down for The Stories of the Boys I Loved, are still linked to the part of Renjiro’s character arc you’ll discover in the “Oliver x Renjiro” route.

Another idea I had was makingan otome game in which you would at first help your gay best friend date the guy you both have a crush on, and it was up to you to decide whether you’d sacrifice your love story or not. The protagonist was named Hanako and her gay bestie Hiro. Sounds kinda similar to Hana and Renjiro, don't you think?

So, as I was struck by lightning while I was knocking over my trashcan (or maybe it was in The Sims 4, I don’t know), I decided to combine these two ideas: Anna was going to be the protagonist of the latter idea, Renjiro would be your gay best friend and Daisuke the suitor. By following the “Renjiro x Daisuke” route, you would discover Renjiro’s backstory and help him with his dream of opening a bakery. By following the “Anna x Daisuke” route, you would instead discover Daisuke’s backstory and help him make his dreams come true (which is quite spoiler territory, so I won’t say anything).

BUILDING THESE CHARACTERS

Yet, I didn’t want Anna to be any otome game heroine: I wanted her to confront the trope she seems to embrace, not just some goofy and overly-embarrassed girl. So, instead, as stated before, Anna took a lot from the yamato nadeshiko. She was at first very traditional, but… well, she was kind-of mary-suesque and bland: she was calm, only worrying about saving these boys. Yet, romanticising saviour complex didn’t sit right with me. So I had to let the idea mature.

Then, I decided to make Hana (who got this name at this moment) a modernised version of the yamato nadeshiko: she would master to some extent some refined arts, have a really composed personality and show qualities people would say most Japanese women don’t have anymore. Yet, she would be ambitious: her dream is to become an engineer and she is willing to show qualities you would expect from the yamato nadeshiko to achieve it (resilience, perseverance, meticulousness). She would also have her secret hobby for yaoi, which might be inspired by Kiss him not me! I’m not really sure since I really didn’t have it in mind while writing her character, and considering I’m not fond of this anime (because of how fatphobic it is and mostly because of the worst take I have ever seen on sexual assault in a shojo), but I watched it, so I suppose it must have inspired me to some extent. She became a more fleshed-out character who came to life.

Renjiro’s character also went through a lot of changes: at first, he embodied the “soft boy trope”, rather than the “student council president” one. He therefore gained much more confidence (at least in appearance) and a less frail body-type. His character arc has also changed a lot and, without giving too many spoilers (although I’d love to), it got more focused on his homosexuality (and I totally scrapped the bakery idea away; after all, the guy's seventeen...).

At this point, I had a realisation: to offer a meaningful take on homosexuality and to give relevance to the rewriting of the yamato nadeshiko, the game had to take more in consideration than usual animes that it is set in Japan. And good Lord, I still have a lot of reading ahead of me about homophobia in Japan.

It was at this moment I realised I needed a character to counterbalance that: to create conflict between Renjiro’s closeted nature and a “proud and loud” kind-of-character. It made sense for this character to come from abroad and have a different perspective on things: Oliver Dawson was created and has quickly become my favourite character as I developed his character arc.

Regarding Daisuke, he always had a chill personality, but he was shaped to be a better opposition to Renjiro’s perfect social status and to have deeper links with him and Hana.

Therefore, it didn’t make sense for Hana to have the same crush than Renjiro right at the start of the game, since… well, there were now two love interests. So, she instead got a crush on… Renjiro (although this change actually occured way before Hanako's name was switched to Hana)!

AND HOW WAS DEVELOPMENT?

Well, the answer would be great and terrible. My mental health has been terrible for the past few months, which didn’t help me accomplish anything great with the game. Yet, once I managed to find the will to work on it… it was surprisingly fast? I mean, this demo is as long as Order me!’s and was coded waaaay faster. It also looks more professional, I think? You guys will decide, but I feel like this game is a real step-forward for me. I’m especially proud of the scene where Hana confesses her love to Renjiro: it took a lot of rewriting, of coding, of adjusting but I think it’s the best scene I have ever put in one of my games. I play it over and over again because… well, even as a player, I really love this scene. It’s the first time I feel that my coding really enhances my writing. I hope I'm not the only one that this scene will move..

WHAT TO EXPECT FOR THE FUTURE?

Well, that’s a good question. Right now, I’m working on my yuri jam project (obviously cute and not bittersweet story about lesbians being CRUSHED BY A METEOR), but it won’t stop work on The Stories of the Boys I Loved. So, you should expect two major updates for the game: first, I would like to release the common part of each route (the part of the route during which you either make Renjiro date the suitor, or you end up dating him yourself). This should bring around twice as much content as the prologue (1h30 for each route).

The second major update would be the release of the specific routes: “Hana x Oliver, “Renjiro x Oliver”, “Hana x Daisuke” and “Renjiro x Daisuke”, each with its two endings. Each route should also be between 1 and 1h30, which adds four to six more hours of content. Count at least one more hour with the eight endings. So expect a game lasting 9h30 to 11h30 (which is quite long for an indie dev lmao what am i doing)! But in case I'm not clear, please take a look at the following diagram:

Anyway, I hope you guys will stick around, if you enjoyed the demo! So excited to show you the full-extent of these characters!

And just before leaving, what about a small hint of the future routes?

Hana x Oliver: challenged optimism
Hana x Daisuke: capitalism sucks
Renjiro x Oliver: gay mess
Renjiro x Daisuke: erm… so… what are we exactly?

Kissu kissu on your waifu (or husbando or anything like you do you)